What sort of man is Mr Special??

“What sort of man is Mr Special...?” (Part One)

One of the questions that I am constantly asked since Mr Special shot to fame a year or so ago, is, “what sort of a man is Mr Special...really?” 

In an attempt to get to the bottom of this quandary, I believe a dissection is in order, as I do feel that Mr Special is somewhat like an onion, & not just because at times he can be so aggravating it’s enough to make one’s eyes water!  He is a man of many a layer, some annoying, some, not so annoying, but always with the undertone of...special!

An Old Soul...

Or more accurately....an Old Woman’s Soul!  Some days I’ll sit back & casually watch him go about his daily ritual...yelling at the kids, yelling at the dogs, anally sweeping the floors until the skin on his little hands begin to blister & bleed & I can very clearly envisage him in a floral house coat with a little apron on, curlers in the hair...muttering beneath his breath, “why am I the only person in this house who respects things??”

Somewhat Accident Prone...

Some days I am quietly comforted in the knowledge that should something ridiculously comical befall someone in our family, it will...without fail, befall Barry!

For example, one evening myself & Barry went out in Perth for a ‘romantic’ dinner, just the two of us, which unfortunately ended in a pre-marital spat (over what I can’t remember), & Barry huffed off across the road, in his sensible little navy jacket & good shoes, (as the restaurant had a ‘no sneakers’ policy!), when he stepped off the curb & smack bang into a pothole full of freshly poured concrete...Jenny – 1, Peter – nil!!

A Lover of ‘Pets’...

One of my favourite days of late, was a beautiful sunny Sunday morning when our friends decided it would be a good idea (& an extremely amusing one), to take Mr Special to the doggy beach, (& anyone who knows Barry well, would know that this was his equivalent to a day trip to hell!).  To enhance the experience, our friends also decided it would be a good idea to get breakfast at the McDonald’s drive thru, unbeknown to us however, they ate theirs prior to arriving at the beach, but due to Barry’s anal car antics, we weren’t allowed to eat ours until we arrived at the beach...picture it now...five hundred dogs, one family of idiots & a bag full of Maccas...(at this point it would be pertinent to mention that Barry was also sporting a rather gargantuan hangover at the time!). 

Needless to say it didn’t end well, ‘Max’ the Labrador did a flying leap through us all & grabbed Charlie’s hash brown, straight out of his hand, leaving only the wrapper & crying child in his wake, & another nameless canine scored two of Macy’s pancakes, again, cue the crying child! 

My very favourite part of the morning however, & one that has left a lasting impression on me & our friends, is when Mr Special got out of the car, looked down at the beach full of canine love, shook his head & whispered, ever so mournfully, “soooo many dogs!”

Hearing Impaired

Unfortunately, my frequent suggestions of a trip to the Lion’s Hearing Van, often falls on ‘deaf ears’, literally.

You be the judge...recently I said to Barry, “Soph wants us to take her to see the Duyfken”, to which he responded, “no way!”...because, after careful cross examination, he thought I said, “Soph wants you to take her surfing!”  & given that Mr Special can’t ride a bike, surfing may present somewhat of a challenge!!

Jen